How To BURN Your Dinner: for all of the moms sharing my non-pinterest worthy day!

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The Culprits Up To No Good!

Motherhood is about trying, failing, and trying again. Although we all like to think of ourselves as super moms, truth is…most of our days aren’t even close to Pinterest perfection. We post our best mommy moments on Facebook, but really? Is that reality? Being a mom is hard, tiring, dirty, and sometimes downright ugly. I usually don’t post the poopy blow-out that ends up on my face, the Target mid-aisle meltdown, or the close call in the parking lot. But, today, I decided to affirm all of the moms out there by acknowledging that none of us are perfect, myself included!

How To Burn Your Dinner…

Necessary Ingredients:

1 long day

1 poopy diaper

1 mischievous toddler

1 naughty dog

1 distracted mama

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My Thrifty Find!

It all started with a silly package of sliced french bread! Since I had just posted my recipe on crostinis I decided to whip some up myself. As I was speeding past the freezer section in the grocery store with my whining toddler (yes, I broke down and bought ice cream) my eyes landed on a bag of sliced french bread with a manager’s special sticker! ¬†25 cents! What can you buy for 25 cents these days??? Proud of my thrifty find, I tossed it in the cart and raced toward the finish line! As we approached the check out counter I remembered that I had forgotten to grab green peppers for the pizza. Back I hauled my oversized cart with the kiddy car to the opposite side of the store. I grabbed the pepper and once again headed toward the check out counter. Thankfully, the check out guy was kind enough to offer my now adamantly “DONE SHOPPING” daughter some stickers to get us through the line. I actually remembered my coupon (which never happens), and I assured Ayla that we would be home eating dinner in no time. I peeked into her red car to check on her and noticed that her favorite (okay, my favorite) hair band had fallen off of her head. Then to my frustration I realized that it hadn’t fallen off, Ayla had taken it off and intentionally launched it from the car somewhere in the store. With my cart full of bagged groceries, we began going aisle by aisle through the grocery store, with me muttering to her the whole time in as calm of a voice as I could muster, “Ayla, if you hadn’t thrown your bow we could be home by now. Why did you do that?Mommy has no clue where it might be. This is incredibly frustrating. etc. etc. etc.”

I’m sure you have all tried to maneuver the grocery carts with the cars. It’s like driving a semi on an Italian side street! I’m pretty sure that I missed everyone’s toes (if not…sorry) as I plowed ahead on my mission. Not in the produce department, not at lost and found, not in the cheese department. Frozen food was free of all accessories. Score! Cracker aisle! Hair bow found and mommy happy! I’m embarrassed (and so is Ayla) to say that I danced a jig in aisle 7.

Getting through the parking lot was a little crazy! How is it possible for every car to have their reverse lights on at the exact same time? It was like a scary version of dodge ball. We made it to the car in one piece, but as the groceries came out of the cart, Ayla was reminded of how hungry her tummy had become. Being a really bad mom, I handed her a bag of veggie straws. Not really the best option right before dinner. But, she was happy. I always take my cart back to the carousel, but today I wanted to get in the car and get home. Yes, that’s right! I’m the mom who left the cart in the middle of the only available parking spot!

photophoto 3We made it home with only a few minutes of crying. An hour behind schedule wasn’t too bad, right? I pulled out my french bread, turned on the broiler, and shoved them in the oven. In the meantime I went on to whip up a semi-homeade pasta sauce and some tortellini. My hungry munchkin wasn’t having it. Since dinner wouldn’t be ready for sometime, I pulled out carrots, a squeeze veggie pack, and some chicken for Ayla. Presto, dinner was served. After I was done washing her up, I started my pasta sauce. Things were under control until I heard the distinct splash of water. Yes, Ayla had dumped the dog’s water dish all over the hardwood floors. By the time I got to the dish, I noticed that Ayla now had two hands full of dog food and a piece of dog food stuck between her front teeth. I couldn’t help but screech!

photo 2My rotisserie chicken was sitting just a little too close to the counter edge, and while I was cleaning up his spilled water bowl, my dog decided to join in on the action. Let’s just say that he loves rotisserie chicken! He is such a lover that he doesn’t even leave any evidence…down go bones and all! It’s like a chicken rapture! With my chicken missing and my sauce now starting to overheat, I turned to find Ayla pulling at her pants. She waved her hand in front of her face to indicate that something was stinky, and I knew that she was trying to tell me that she was poopy. Why she thought she needed to take her pants and diaper off…I’m not sure. Thankfully, I was able to prevent a major poop catastrophe in the kitchen. I raced her upstairs, changed her diaper and congratulated myself on keeping my cool.

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photoAs we came to the top of the stairs I noticed the distinct smell of burning food. Burning? What could be burning? My FRENCH BAGUETTE! I had entirely forgotten about my crostinis! They¬†were a little more than overdone. Ah, well, at least I had only used half of them. Back in the oven went a fresh set of bread slices. I set the timer this time! I searched the fridge for my fig preserves. I knew that they were in there somewhere! I couldn’t make goat cheese and fig crostinis without the figs! Recipe revision…goat cheese and mixed berry preserve crostinis tonight. With my appetizer under control, I pulled out a back up chicken from the fridge, finished dinner, and thanked heaven that daddy would be home soon!

All in all…this was a pretty good day even if it wasn’t Pinterest worthy. A few bumps on the road here and there, but what mom doesn’t have those? While none of us need a tutorial on how to burn dinner (I assume it comes pretty naturally to most moms), all of us need a reminder that although our daily lives may not be picture perfect, we are still pretty awesome moms. We love our kids and what could be more pinnable than that!

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From The Mom in Me, MD